sword-918542_1920 PixabayExasperated and weary from battle I attempt to stand. I am fighting a duplicitous battle, a physical and spiritual battle. Daily I struggle with morning paralysis and extreme weakness.

Physically, I battle a yet-to-be-named neuromuscular disorder. I am waiting for genetic testing to be approved by my insurance so I can name (and slay) this beast. Steading myself, I rise to stand, cautious to have a hand, chair, or hand ready to grasp. My legs wobble like a foal learning to walk. It seems as though my legs have forgotten their purpose.

I reach for my marred sword. I cannot raise my arms; the disease has me frozen in a myotonic state. I hold my battered spiritual sword and pray. I’m weary, worn, and beat.

This second battle is spiritual. The Enemy is attacking me. I can’t see him, but I feel the effects. While I don’t know the name of my neuromuscular battle, I do know the name of the one instigating this second battle. His name is Satan, the Enemy, the serpent, and the Accuser.

Each day, I pull my red chair God’s throne, touching knees with the Almighty. I hear these battle songs echoing around me. Donning on “full armor of God” as referenced in Ephesians six, I seek the Lord’s face and strength for both battles.

Here are a list and link of my favorite battle songs:

Victor’s Crown by Darlene Zschech

Rooftops by Jesus Culture

Overcomer by Mandisa

It Is Well by Kristene DiMarco and Bethel music

No Longer Slaves by Jonathan David and Melissa HelserArmy-boots-cropped-by-Brian-Merrill-pixabay

Break Every Chain by Jesus Culture

I Will Bless the Lord by Byron Cage

Till the Walls Come Down by Martha Munizzi

Holy Spirit by Kim Walker Smith

Even though I continue to battle, it is well with my soul.

Keep marching!

~April Dawn White

Photos courtesy of Pixabay.com

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